Am I being an Ahole? Update Page 7

[5JeepsAz]

Em. Well, the OP asked for opinions, which are just like the subject matter at hand, and we all got 'em. So let's just take on a case by case basis, for examples. First, he paid up front. Second, he worked with the guy. Third, he got ghosted. Fourth, he exercised the power behind why we all pay for stuff using the Amex. Therefore, he's okay in the situation, because he cleverly is reserving his right to be one.. it all comes down his definition of a "narrow escape"

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[ShadowsPapa]

I would want to get my money back but what if his house burnt down? Or his daughter died? Also why are you buggin a small business on a Sunday! lol

No really I want to give them the benefit of the doubt, maybe email one more time with your intentions to dispute the charges and see how they respond?

Funny thing about what you said - I am admin for the AMC Forum - and we have a cheers and jeers section. More than once when there was an issue like this, we found the person being blasted was in the hospital, or their wife was found to have cancer and they were there every day, that sort of thing. One appeared to be a case of divorce and anyone who has been through that knows what it does to life.
SOMETIMES there's a human explanation.
What we recommended in the past was a certified letter - email should NEVER be relied on for this sort of thing.
Skip the email - who knows if they are even getting it.

My advice to anyone who is having problems with a business transaction - seriously? Relying on email as a sure thing? Nope. For all you know he's not even getting it. We had that happen last summer when our main home email went funky. Something changed at the ISP and it was a mess.
Never rely on email, never assume they got it - assume they did NOT get it.
Email and texts are NOT sure things and it's amazing that people believe they can be relied on. Try it in court - tell the judge "I sent them emails and they ignore them" and see how far you get. Even the ISP can't prove they were actually READ.

Send a certified letter - get a signature.

(I worked IT for years - email is a joke for business and some won't even deal with email for their business. It's nice if they do, but it's a very unreliable means of communication.)

 

[jjs3845]

OP :
So did the business respond? Did Amex take care of you?

 

[JohnnyUtah]

Funny thing about what you said - I am admin for the AMC Forum - and we have a cheers and jeers section. More than once when there was an issue like this, we found the person being blasted was in the hospital, or their wife was found to have cancer and they were there every day, that sort of thing. One appeared to be a case of divorce and anyone who has been through that knows what it does to life.
SOMETIMES there's a human explanation.
What we recommended in the past was a certified letter - email should NEVER be relied on for this sort of thing.
Skip the email - who knows if they are even getting it.

My advice to anyone who is having problems with a business transaction - seriously? Relying on email as a sure thing? Nope. For all you know he's not even getting it. We had that happen last summer when our main home email went funky. Something changed at the ISP and it was a mess.
Never rely on email, never assume they got it - assume they did NOT get it.
Email and texts are NOT sure things and it's amazing that people believe they can be relied on. Try it in court - tell the judge "I sent them emails and they ignore them" and see how far you get. Even the ISP can't prove they were actually READ.

Send a certified letter - get a signature.

(I worked IT for years - email is a joke for business and some won't even deal with email for their business. It's nice if they do, but it's a very unreliable means of communication.)

They are both still active on social media.

 

[JohnnyUtah]

OP :
So did the business respond? Did Amex take care of you?

Amex is still awaiting merchant response. They have until the 26th to respond.

 

[ShadowsPapa]

They are both still active on social media.

That's different - and odd.......

 

[SwampNut]

Certified mail? Really? Insanity. It's 2021. I just went through a couple of months of medical issues with my mom, dropping everything and leaving town a few times. I'd never see the mail. The box got reverted to the post office because it was full (and I still haven't picked it up since it's 2021, anything important is electronic). But the whole time I could keep up with email.

If they're still on social media and marketing, I guess this proves they're just scumbags.

 

[ShadowsPapa]

Certified mail? Really? Insanity. It's 2021. I just went through a couple of months of medical issues with my mom, dropping everything and leaving town a few times. I'd never see the mail. The box got reverted to the post office because it was full (and I still haven't picked it up since it's 2021, anything important is electronic). But the whole time I could keep up with email.

If they're still on social media and marketing, I guess this proves they're just scumbags.

Yes, really. Agreed in your case it wouldn't have worked, but in court........ you have proof of both ends. You can't prove email and email can be filtered by the ISP, go to spam in the middle, at the receiver's end and so on. I worked IT for years and the common thread was always - don't rely on email. Even being on social media doesn't prove they received emails.
I can give a perfect example of that since I administer a forum - some people were complaining about not getting emails from the forum. Found out that another entity was sending out spam emails and they went through the same server - and since the server has ONE IP address, the forum IP ended up on a spam list due to the IP (if you have a DEDICATED server that's different but few actually do) so some people who had an ISP who used that spam list service were not receiving emails because their ISP blocked them. They never knew the emails were being blocked at the host!
I can give multiple reasons even in 2021 email is not a reliable method, it's better than it was, but even today if you must prove something, email isn't there. You'd need a court order to show if the emails ended up on that person's devices. (I've worked cases with the Iowa DCI, the FBI, etc. and done a lot of computer forensics for various reasons)

Yes, YOU would not have received a letter - but another party would have proof of what happened, and so would YOU.
There is no perfect solution.

On the other hand, maybe there is....... we had a hell of a time with a company that put together our sunroom a year and a half ago. I gave the guy a punch list, he took pics, I took pics, and he said "someone will be in contact". Never happened.
A few months later we got a call from them asking how we liked it - we both lit into the guy and told him of the problems, about the other fellow, and his response was "I know who should have that information, I'll pass it along and someone will be in contact".
Never happened.
I got into their social media - FB, their web site reviews and so on, posted the pictures showing how crappy things were, listed the problems and told people to contact me and I'd be happy to "show off our new sunroom". A few hours later I got a call saying they'd be sending someone out the following week. That next Friday, someone DID come out and fixed several of the issues and said that another crew would be out to replace the rain gutters - completely.
That crew is here now - with rain gutters twice as nice and far better installation than the first setup. The other guy even brought cleaning supplies and thoroughly cleaned the inside of the room after I complained on their FB page about the scuffs, black marks, and filth all over the ceiling.
The roof has been made better but the installer screwed up that part of our house roof so badly only a re-roof would fix that. It's better anyway, shingles are no longer sticking up and rain no longer going up under the shingles.

So if you have a real beef with someone - use social media! LOL - it gets their attention like nothing else.

 

[Jerhemi]

time to tell us who they are

 

[Gvsukids]

Jtops sent an email detailing how they are behind on orders because of supplier shortages and won't compromise quality. Responding to the email goes directly to the President of the Jtop.

 

[texanjeeper]

Not to drag the thread in the weeds but it occurred to me that forum posts can incite the defensive mechanism in our brains very fast, whereas if we were all sitting around having a beer around a fire, and somebody said something like was said on page 5 of this thread, we'd all be laughing including the OP.

 

[ShadowsPapa]

Ordered a new cabinet door - STANDARD SIZE, STANDARD FINISH. Not a special order, we opened the back of the kitchen peninsula and made the opening the same size as what could be bought standard. That was 2.5 months ago. It just came in. Standard wait time - 4 weeks for standard sizes and finish. This was 2 1/2 times the standard time. Short compared to some other things but some industries are hit a lot harder than others.
Normally I can send a sample of my zinc plating bath to the chemists at the company I buy the supplies from and in 1 week get results. It's now closer to 4 weeks. Imagine a big industrial customer waiting even a week for results.

 

[ShadowsPapa]

Not to drag the thread in the weeds but it occurred to me that forum posts can incite the defensive mechanism in our brains very fast, whereas if we were all sitting around having a beer around a fire, and somebody said something like was said on page 5 of this thread, we'd all be laughing including the OP.

That is the best post I've seen for a very long time in ANY forum, FB, you name it. That one wins.
I take it you are very smart and observant, or are a professional psychologist (of course one could be the same as the other but that's not always the case)

 

[texanjeeper]

That is the best post I've seen for a very long time in ANY forum, FB, you name it. That one wins.
I take it you are very smart and observant, or are a professional psychologist (of course one could be the same as the other but that's not always the case)

Nah, I"m just a computer software grunt, but I do like to observe people. I'm the kind of guy who sits in airports watching people go by, snickering at some of the things I see.

 

[ShadowsPapa]

Nah, I"m just a computer software grunt, but I do like to observe people. I'm the kind of guy who sits in airports watching people go by, snickering at some of the things I see.

LOL - you and my wife. She goes to the state fair to watch people as much as eat the food and see the sights. Agreed, some of the stuff........... and some is scary.

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