Hopefully as the 5 day including last Saturday draws to a close The Donald will realize that Covid-19 awful facts are, loosing ones (his) job, & getting thrown out of his home is a reality and being POTUS was a Honor ! Well my thought is its mostly BS anyway !
3 blonds take the final test to become a LEO. Leo officer shows picture. Ist blond says the felon has one eye, second blond says felon has one ear. Leo says its a side view. 3rd blond says felon wears contact lenses. Leo officer asks her how she figures it out ? Blond answers, well with only one eye and one ear how could he wear glasses !
A truck driver stopped at a roadside diner for lunch and ordered a cheeseburger, coffee and a slice of apple pie. As he was about to eat, three bikers walked in.
One grabbed the trucker's cheeseburger and took a huge bite from it. The second one drank the trucker's coffee, and the third wolfed down his apple pie. The truck driver didn't say a word as he paid the waitress and left.
As the waitress walked up, one of the motorcyclists growled, "He ain't much of a man, is he?"
"He's not much of a driver, either," the waitress replied. "He just backed his 18-wheeler over three motorcycles."
One blonde and one brunette, inherit the family ranch. Unfortunately, after just a few years, they are in financial trouble. In order to keep the bank from repossessing the ranch, they need to purchase a bull from the stockyard in a far town so that they can breed their own stock.
They only have $600 left. Upon leaving, the brunette tells her sister, "When I get there, if I decide to buy the bull, I'll contact you to drive out after me and haul it home."
The brunette arrives at the stockyard, inspects the bull, and decides she wants to buy it. The man tells her that he will sell it for $599, no less. After paying him, she drives to the nearest town to send her sister a telegram to tell her the news. She walks into the telegraph office and says, "I want to send a telegram to my sister telling her that I've bought a bull for our ranch. I need her to hitch the trailer to our pickup truck and drive out here so we can haul it home."
The telegraph operator explains that he'll be glad to help her, then adds, "It's just 99 cents a word." Well, after paying for the bull, the brunette only has $1 left. She realizes that she'll only be able to send her sister one word.
After a few minutes of thinking, she nods and says, "I want you to send her one word: comfortable."
The operator shakes his head. 'How is she ever going to know that you want her to hitch the trailer to your pickup truck and drive out here to haul that bull back to your ranch if you send her just the word "comfortable?"
The brunette explains, "My sister's blonde. The word's big. She'll read it very slowly ... com-for-da-bull."
One day Temel was driving his truck down the road when he realized that his brakes were not working.
Just when he was trying to think of what to do, he came to a fork in the road. On one side, there was an enormous festival, with thousands of people, and on the other side, there was one kid playing with a ball. After very little thought, Temel decided that killing one kid was preferable to killing thousand of people, and decided to drive at that kid.
The next morning, Temel's friend, Dursun, saw Temel on the news, with the headline "Crazy Trucker Drives Into Festival, Massacres Thousands". Dursun immediately calls Temel and asks him why he didn't drive towards the kid instead of killing so many people.
Temel responds, "Well, Dursun, I was doing that, but at the last second the kid ran towards the festival!"
Hunter shoots a duck & it falls in a farmers field. Hunter crosses fence to retrieve the Duck. Farmer Brown stops the hunter and says, "Ducks on my property, its my duck." Hunter wants his duck and asks it they can't come to an agreement. Farmer Brown says, "well lets take turns kicking each other in the balls, winner takes duck" Hunter Dave thinks about it and really wants the duck so says, "OK" Farmer Brown says "my land I take the first kick" and kicks Hunter Dave in balz. Well dave drops and rolls, screams and spasms for 45 minutes to an hour. Finally struggling to stand Dave says, Now its my turn" Farmer Brown says, "oh what the hell take the dam duck"!