Buying a car for a family member when they get old enough to drive

[KX L]

My parents and I must have socialism all wrong as we both bought our children starter cars so they (me) could drive straight to work. I guess one of them quitting their job to chauffeur me to work instead of spoiling me with a $400.00 1979 Ford Fairmont was a better choice. I guess I should of just turned them down, stayed home and lived off them…but wouldn’t that be socialism? I’m confused…

Not at all. That's why I gave my perspective---and asked for the reason why you voted the way you did.

Your parents and everyone else on here that bought a beater has a really good reason to do so from the entries so far. There was a contract [not written down obviously] between you and your parents---you weren't given a car just to have one. You were given one so you could get to a job which makes perfect sense.

If you had immediately quit work or refused to find a job just to have fun would you have still gotten or been able to keep the car?

Socialism is the impossible dream. "Equality" across the board even though people have totally different abilities and motivations to do their part. But the dream is "so important" that those in charge are willing to take from those that have [steal what isn't theirs] in order to produce "equality". Note that Socialist countries, operate just like our Congress, the rules those in power make never seem to apply to them.

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[KX L]

Lol this bugged you that much in the other thread eh?

People can do what they want with their money.

I guess it did.

Not arguing that people can spend their money as they want at all, or the right of parents to raise their kids the way they see fit. Just interested in what those on the forum think about the issue.

 

[TroutFishingInAmerica]

My Father split the cost of my first vehicle with me. 1948 Chevy pickup. Three on the tree, bench seat with no seat belts, your baby could sit close and snuggle while you were driving. Ahhh the good ole days.

 

[Liftr]

My dad gave me my first car. He worked about an hour away 6-7 days a week because he would never say no to overtime, so he always had a few beaters. It was a 99 Nissan Altima that I got with about 95k on it. Had it in high school, then not my freshman year of college, but after that, and then until I bought my own car and gave it back. He ended up with like 350k on it. So our kids will get some sort of hand-me-down, beater, or neighbor's old car when they can pay for their own gas and insurance. If they need help with with an unexpected expensive repair, I'll probably help them out there too.

Hmm. I still have a 99 Nissan Altima…

 

[Montana_Wildcat]

My dad bought me my first three cars back in the late 80's/early 90's. All together, they cost about the same as the car we recently bought my daughter. There were no part-time jobs where we live, so she couldn't have bought her own. Now that she is at college and working a job, she is paying us for her phone and car insurance.

 

[Blue Ridge]

I got a weekend job at a textile mill while in high school and was saving up for my first car when my Mom bought me a $100 very used diesel Chevette for my 17th birthday. To the best of my memory I had about $600 saved up and that was far from what I wanted, but a car is a car when you're a poor teenager. I am not sure there has ever been a car with less acceleration than my diesel Chevette. I get that she wanted me in something I wouldn't likely kill myself in, but the most dangerous part of owning this car was trying to pass. Another plus for the diesel Chevette was that half the times I fueled it up, an attendant came out running and flailing his arms screaming "That's the DIESEL pump!" Good times.

There's no harm in buying a kid a car if they're a grounded kid with some appreciation. And if they're like I was, a beater is a good option. I'd wager most teenagers aren't great drivers and if they're liable to crash it, might as well be a low investment -plus I'd like to think they'll probably appreciate the car they buy for themselves down the road more. And let's be honest, a lot of kids are given cars because otherwise you become the parent taxi.

 

[punk'n]

My Father split the cost of my first vehicle with me. 1948 Chevy pickup. Three on the tree, bench seat with no seat belts, your baby could sit close and snuggle while you were driving. Ahhh the good ole days.

I miss my old '48 Chevy truck! (But I still have my '49 Ford F-1 )

 

[sdtkeld]

Not at all. That's why I gave my perspective---and asked for the reason why you voted the way you did.

Your parents and everyone else on here that bought a beater has a really good reason to do so from the entries so far. There was a contract [not written down obviously] between you and your parents---you weren't given a car just to have one. You were given one so you could get to a job which makes perfect sense.

If you had immediately quit work or refused to find a job just to have fun would you have still gotten or been able to keep the car?

Socialism is the impossible dream. "Equality" across the board even though people have totally different abilities and motivations to do their part. But the dream is "so important" that those in charge are willing to take from those that have [steal what isn't theirs] in order to produce "equality". Note that Socialist countries, operate just like our Congress, the rules those in power make never seem to apply to them.

My powder blue chariot would have been parked because I wouldn’t have the means to pay for gas. Anything I wanted beside food, clothing and shelter I was on the hook for it. The philosophy my parents handed down to me was their job was to provide me the tools to earn a better life, not give it to me.

 

[AmosMoses01]

Good thread, good discussion. My anecdote/background - back before the turn of the century, I was able to get my driver's license at 15. (Ha!) In the early 80's, when I was 14 and had my learner's permit, my dad pointed to the F-100 with 250k+ miles on it that had sat with grass growing up around it for quite some time, and said, "if you can get it to run, you can have it." With my grandfather's help, I got it running. It had the 4.1 liter in line six, an 8 foot bed, and power - nothing. No power steering or brakes. No A/C. AM radio. It leaked oil like a sieve - I bought used oil in 3 liter soda bottles (remember those?) that I'd take to the oil change place and got filled for fifty cents a 3 liter bottle. I'd go through one of those every couple of weeks.

For all that, my 15 year old self thought it was glorious - having the freedom to drive myself someplace was so awesome. Getting it running (which was all my grandfather's doing) was super statisfying - a sense of achievement. I guess this is why I enjoy Vice Grip Garage on YouTube so much.

It didn't impress anyone, and the school I went to was a private Catholic school that was half day students (locals) and half boarders, who were all very wealthy. I remember one guy got a brand new DeLorian on his 15th birthday, and another set of brothers who were ticked off at their parents for only getting them one Porche 944 to <gasp> share when they turned 15. There was no competing with those guys as far as the "who has the best car" game went. <shrug> Most of those guys had no regard nor any appreciation for what they were given... and those vehicles were trashed out before they graduated.

I have known folks who were well off and given nice cars for their driving age birthday, yet also were raised to appreciate what they were given. I've known folks who were not well off at all, but didn't appreciate anything they had.

In our case, we were prepared to "enable" our kiddo with a vehicle to drive (at our discretion) when she was old enough - but there were strings attached, among them being completion of driver's education courses well beyond the state required one. Note - she didn't even start this process until over a year after she was old enough to get a permit/driver's license - she and nearly all her peers simply weren't interested in driving as early as possible. (I could tell at that point that I was actually old, because I couldn't relate to that at all.) In the end, she chose not to meet our requirements, so we traded the vehicle she was going to be enabled with for a toy (MX-5) for me. It really wasn't a spite thing, it was a principle thing. Years later, she had a different perspective and attitude, so at that time we enabled her with a vehicle that wasn't being used. It wasn't fun going through some of those days, but we're glad we made the choices we did. Dang, I didn't intend on this becoming a novel .

 

[Chance575]

I got a weekend job at a textile mill while in high school and was saving up for my first car when my Mom bought me a $100 very used diesel Chevette for my 17th birthday. To the best of my memory I had about $600 saved up and that was far from what I wanted, but a car is a car when you're a poor teenager. I am not sure there has ever been a car with less acceleration than my diesel Chevette. I get that she wanted me in something I wouldn't likely kill myself in, but the most dangerous part of owning this car was trying to pass. Another plus for the diesel Chevette was that half the times I fueled it up, an attendant came out running and flailing his arms screaming "That's the DIESEL pump!" Good times.

There's no harm in buying a kid a car if they're a grounded kid with some appreciation. And if they're like I was, a beater is a good option. I'd wager most teenagers aren't great drivers and if they're liable to crash it, might as well be a low investment -plus I'd like to think they'll probably appreciate the car they buy for themselves down the road more. And let's be honest, a lot of kids are given cars because otherwise you become the parent taxi.

my 1st 1982 chevette 4 door gasser……I stilll look very now and then for a diesel. Diesel never came with a/c cuz it could not hold at speed with the a\c going

 

[The Crusader]

My parents provided a car for me to drive, but it was their car. When I dropped out of college and went into the military, they kept the car. I did the same for my boys. I did sell my oldest our 4runner for pretty cheap when he went into the military. It had 165k miles on it and I sold it to him for the cost of all of the maintenance to keep it dependable. Pinion bearings, tires, water pump, spark plugs, battery, fluid changes, etc...... The only thing I ever paid someone else to fix was the pinion bearings and tires.

 

[Trickster]

So after reading some very long life stories and opinions on this topic, I forgot what forum I was on.
Many are of the opinion that by not buying a vehicle for them will make their children more successful. Successful at what? Self reliance?
Values? Why draw the line at vehicles, did you buy your own bicycle,
shoes?
Is hardship the way to teach life lessons? Does making your child pay for their own vehicle make them a better person?
Every child is different in so many ways, regardless of the way they get their first vehicle does not decide how they evolve into adulthood.
What you as a parent do each and everyday of their lives to teach them respect, values, morals, kindness and how to be loving is what is important.
If you have the ability to assist them financially to make their start in adulthood and their careers easier….why not?
Yes their are the spoiled rich kid brats out there, but those children are an exception to the rule. If by providing some assistance for reliable transportation allows your child to have one less stressor at transition to adulthood and beyond is that really a bad thing?
Times have changed or have they? As back in the 1800’s and earlier most boys earned their first horse from Dad through chores and hard work from an early age.
I saved my allowance when I was a child for a long time so I could buy my first car. $1300 for a 70 VW Beetle. Delivered a lot of newspapers, painted a lot of fences and picked a lot of weeds to get there, because my family didn’t have much money. But that doesn’t make it right or wrong, as I helped my children buy their first vehicles and they are very decent hardworking adults today.
I’m rambling, my apologies.

 

[Trickster]

So after reading some very long life stories and opinions on this topic, I forgot what forum I was on.
Many are of the opinion that by not buying a vehicle for their them will make their children more successful. Successful at what? Self reliance?
Values? Why draw the line at vehicles, did you buy your own bicycle,
shoes?
Is hardship the way to teach life lessons? Does making your child pay for their own vehicle make them a better person?
Every child is different in so many ways, regardless of the way they get their first vehicle does not decide how they evolve into adulthood.
What you as a parent do each and everyday of their lives to teach them respect, values, morals, kindness and how to be loving is what is important.
If you have the ability to assist them financially to make their start in adulthood and their careers easier….why not?
Yes there are the spoiled rich kid brats out there, but those children are an exception to the rule. If by providing some assistance for reliable transportation allows your child to have one less stressor at transition to adulthood and beyond is that really a bad thing?
Times have changed,or have they? As back in the 1800’s and earlier most boys earned their first horse from Dad through chores and hard work from an early age.
I saved my allowance when I was a child for a long time so I could buy my first car. $1300 for a 70 VW Beetle. Delivered a lot of newspapers, painted a lot of fences and picked a lot of weeds to get there, because my family didn’t have much money. But that doesn’t make it right or wrong, as I helped my children buy their first vehicles and they are very decent hardworking adults today.
I’m rambling, my apologies.

 

[Sazabi19]

So after reading some very long life stories and opinions on this topic, I forgot what forum I was on.
Many are of the opinion that by not buying a vehicle for them will make their children more successful. Successful at what? Self reliance?
Values? Why draw the line at vehicles, did you buy your own bicycle,
shoes?
Is hardship the way to teach life lessons? Does making your child pay for their own vehicle make them a better person?
Every child is different in so many ways, regardless of the way they get their first vehicle does not decide how they evolve into adulthood.
What you as a parent do each and everyday of their lives to teach them respect, values, morals, kindness and how to be loving is what is important.
If you have the ability to assist them financially to make their start in adulthood and their careers easier….why not?
Yes their are the spoiled rich kid brats out there, but those children are an exception to the rule. If by providing some assistance for reliable transportation allows your child to have one less stressor at transition to adulthood and beyond is that really a bad thing?
Times have changed or have they? As back in the 1800’s and earlier most boys earned their first horse from Dad through chores and hard work from an early age.
I saved my allowance when I was a child for a long time so I could buy my first car. $1300 for a 70 VW Beetle. Delivered a lot of newspapers, painted a lot of fences and picked a lot of weeds to get there, because my family didn’t have much money. But that doesn’t make it right or wrong, as I helped my children buy their first vehicles and they are very decent hardworking adults today.
I’m rambling, my apologies.

It's 1 of the first steps of them being a responsible "adult". A lot of people want to teach their kids that this is the start of them needing to be really responsible and having obligations. They are now driving 3000+lbs and others lives are in their hands. It's also a lesson of 'you may not always have someone to bail you out or give you everything'.

I've had plenty of friends who were chomping at the bit to drive and their parents made them work for a beater and many of them started their first job and did so. This prompted them to start to keep a better schedule, be punctual, and take ownership of what they are doing. I can see this point of view as being the last big lesson baby bird needs before it gets kicked out of the nest.

 

[Trickster]

It's 1 of the first steps of them being a responsible "adult". A lot of people want to teach their kids that this is the start of them needing to be really responsible and having obligations. They are now driving 3000+lbs and others lives are in their hands. It's also a lesson of 'you may not always have someone to bail you out or give you everything'.

I've had plenty of friends who were chomping at the bit to drive and their parents made them work for a beater and many of them started their first job and did so. This prompted them to start to keep a better schedule, be punctual, and take ownership of what they are doing. I can see this point of view as being the last big lesson baby bird needs before it gets kicked out of the nest.

Sorry but I disagree that vehicle ownership is one of the first steps to being a responsible adult. Being responsible started long before owning a vehicle in our household. Being financially obligated to owning “things” doesn’t create the needed accountability for their actions in the big picture of life. Just look at all the irresponsible people that do own vehicles, I see them everyday, with no regard for others.
My 2 cents on this debatable topic.

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